Friday, December 25, 2009

my favorite NCIS quotes [WIP]


  • Some idiot smuggled a koala onto a submarine.
  • Miracles take hard work, Commander.
  • And do turn up the charm, Ziva David, you're a geek, not mentally deranged.
  • Close your eyes. You feel the wood? You don't get a sensation like that from a power tool.


  • So this nutjob was running through the mess hall, and he's completely naked, which is weird...
  • I hate it when you don't know what you're looking for but it might kill you if you find it.
  • I think you're confusing me with some one far less awesome.
  • No one has teeth that white unless they have something to hide.
  • I'm proud of you, like a weird uncle.
  • I AM the American Dream!
  • *grabs Mcgee through the bars* Prison changes a man.
  • Ya know, in Arabic the word for desert is sahara, so Sahara Desert is actually desert desert. Lotta sand.
  • We fail to contact Dubai, word gets to the carrier group in the Med and they scramble F-22 Raptors that... burn sand into glass!
  • I had a hampster named Ferrari.
  • Take a breath, have a keyboard.
  • When the going gets tough, the tough go clubbing.
  • Big "D", little "i", big "N", little "ozzo".
  • My fingers are finging.
  • But it is illegal, right? Don't answer that. I know it's illegal. I'm having fun.
  • The flaw in the plan... was the plan. But I got another plan to end it.
  • It's not really a party 'till the bomb squad says it is.
  • Ya know, since I'm here, it's a shame to waste me, I vote for a group bath.
  • We were just, uh, eavesdropping like little girls.
  • He called his own tip hotline. I'm starting to like this guy.
  • They look funny with clothes on.
  • I love you, boss.


  • You think this is a dwinka-kwink?
  • I do not understand. If you want some one dead, you knock on their door, they answer, you shoot them. Easy.
  • We have been instructed to sit on the baby.
  • Tony, your dieing words will be, "I've seen this film".
  • Some one will die today.
  • "DiNozzo-itis?" Sounds veneral.
  • You might want to do something about your hair, its sticking up like a porcu-swine....wrong a porc-, the little animal with the little spikies...
  • To dry-eyed mice!


  • And I finally watched Titanic. It sinks at the end. Very weird.
  • But to tell Gibbs that you didn't trust Tony?! Which I guess I could also understand. I mean he did just shoot your boyfriend... in your living room... to death... alrght, I'll give you that one.
  • *points to Chip, tied up on the floor* Now can I work alone?
  • Good news and bad news, Gibbs. Good news is, I'm still cute. Bad news? The bomb squad got a little trigger-happy...
  • Sailor on the half-shell!
  • Abby has to pee.
  • Fantasize later, Hemingway.
  • Somebody needs a Happy Meal...
  • Good dog. BAD McGee!
  • Ecuatorial pygmies know how you feel about coincidences, Gibbs.
  • You’re not listening to a word I’m saying. I’m pregnant, McGee. Twins. Haven’t told the father yet…it’s Gibbs. I know it’s wrong but something about his silver hair just gets me all tingly inside.
  • You may be smart, but my geek carries a gun!


  • I've been thinking about buying some tight, red leather pants, something that really cradles my butt...
  • And I'm gonna go do that... after I get... a nutter butter... >.>
  • I'm gonna go... get... a haircut... >.>
  • Why are you showing me mold porn?
  • That IS a pretty sophisticated grammital differentiation.
  • Yeah, it's funny 'till some one plunges to their death.

Palmer (Jimmy)

  • It's not likely he was shot by a bird.
  • I think she got off on the fumes!


  • We do not guess, Timothy. Nor do we assume, presume, conjecture or prognosticate.
  • Danger, intrigue, a damsel in distress, I'm actually looking forward to it!


  • Try not to look so chipper. *drinks coffee* Alright, go.
  • You got that mustache in a box, don't you?
  • Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean people aren't out to get you.
  • I don't know who you lie to, being the bottom of the armed Fed food chain... and not married.
  • And people say WE'RE bastards.


  • Jethro always did like redheads...


  • PS, I don't know where YOUR SIG is, but I'M having trouble walking...

Gibbs: ...ass-kissing on the Hill is a skill.
Jenny: So is castration.
Gibbs: I wear a cup.

Ziva: Uno mas, s'il vous plaƮt!
OMC: You're mixing your languages.
Ziva: And my liquors.

McGee: She'll call when she's ready.
Tony: Last time I said that I ended up tied to a chair in north Africa.

Tony: I thought you were supposed to be dead, Fornell.
Fornell: I got better.

Tony: I thought they couldn't put Humpty Dumpty back together again.
Kate: That's because the king only had horses and men.

Gibbs: The director just assured the Secretary of the Navy we were handling this thing with kid gloves.
Abby: Well we didn't get that memo. Cause, ya know, we're wearing latex.

Abby: Just sit back and let the scientists-
McGee: Kick all kinds of major ass.

Tony: Curious to know what follows red light behavior, Ziva?
Ziva: Uhhhh, potential pregnancy?

Gibbs: *blows the crap outta some guy and his trailor*
Tony: I think ya got 'im, boss.

Tony: The Eraser!
McGee: What movie is that from?
Tony: Oh, I don't know, Flashdance?

Kate: Why do you need two "B"s?
Gibbs: The second one's for "bastard".

Tony: Twenty bucks says McGee's about to say something nobody understands again!
McGee: The GPS co-ordinates came bundled in a proprietary packet. Since it was a beta, I thought-
Gibbs: I'm starting to think you can't help yourself, McGee

Fornell: This is a big deal for you, isn't it, letting me drive your car?
Gibbs: Ah, whatever. You already slept with my wife.

Fornell: You're enjoying this, aren't you?
Gibbs: Oh, only slightly more than a lot.

Tony: Ziva, did you kill Houdini?
Ziva: It is possible, I do not remember all their names. *shrugs*

Ziva: I do have feelings, though I do not express myself the way Abby does.
Tim: No one expresses himself the way Abby does.

Tony: I gotta write a book.
Gibbs: You should read one, first.

Abby: Who's a good Jethro?
Gibbs: I'm a good Jethro.

OMC: You're under arrest.
Gibbs: For what?
OMC: For pissing off the FBI.
Gibbs: Get used to it!

Abby: No plan, just go. Find along the way. If you look for something specific-
McGee: Then there's only one right answer.

Abby: Internet romances never work out.
Tony: They all end in attempted murder, Abby?
Abby: Only the really hot ones, Tony.

Kate: The only thing running through your blood, Tony, is cholesterol. And possibly chlamydia.
Tony: 's curable.

Tim: I'm challenging!
Gibbs: You all are.

Ziva: Toda.
Tony: Prego.

Gibbs: Not an accident.
Abby: Not unless the Angel of Death is going through a Rube Goldberg stage.

Abby: Thank you, sir.
Gibbs: Don't call me sir.
Abby: Thank you, ma'am.

Gibbs: No one is going to hurt you, Abby.
Abby: You're just saying that to make me feel better.
Gibbs: Did it?
Abby: ...Yeah. Can you say it again?
Gibbs: Nobody's gonna hurt you, Abs.

Tony: This looks like a nice place, doesn't it, honey?
McGee: Sure does, sweetcheeks.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

what it means to be Christian

this was originally written by an author i recently ran into on here is her profile:

First and foremost, I am a Christian. I realize that that simple fact puts me at odds with some people, but let me try to explain what that means, in a way you might not have considered before.
People say, "If God is love, then He won't send people to hell. He will accept me." I won't argue with the first part. God is love. God is gracious. God is merciful. But God is also holy. He is just. He is righteous. He can't have anything to do with sin, or He would be denying Who He is. "God is light; in Him there is no darkness at all." (1 John 1:5, NIV)
"But I'm a good person. I try my best. God has to see that."
All right, but what about this? Isaiah 64:6 says that "all our righteous acts are like filthy rags." Romans 3:11-12 and 23 say, "There is no one righteous, not even one; there is no one who understands, no one who seeks God. All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one...For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." (NIV)
We can't make it on our own. A holy God demands perfection, and no matter how hard we try, we can't be perfect. It's like trying to jump the Grand Canyon. You might have someone who can jump, say, her 5'3 1/2" height. And that's good - but she didn't reach the other side. You might have a guy who can jump nearly seven feet - an excellent jump, but he still didn't make it. You could bring in the best Olympic jumper, and he could jump 20 feet. But even he didn't get to the other side. There has to be a bridge.
"But God demonstrated His own love for us in this: while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8, NIV). I once heard Louie Giglio, an amazing speaker, explain it this way: "This is where the holiness of God and the love of God collide." God loves us. He wants to restore the relationship between us. So He, in His perfect love and holiness, sent His Son Jesus to die for us.
Jesus is the way to be forgiven. Jesus is the way to be saved. Jesus is the way to have a right relationship with God. Jesus is the way to be set free.
You might say, "How can you say that Jesus is the only way? He can't be the only way. That's intolerant!" Well, He claimed to be "the Way, the Truth, and the Life; no one comes to the Father but through Me." (John 14:6, NIV). I'm only repeating what He said. And He also said, "...wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it." (Matthew 7:13-14, NIV)
So you might call me intolerant...narrow-minded...hateful. "Everyone should just be free to believe whatever they want to believe. You've got to just leave people alone; that's love." No, that's being a coward. That's like seeing someone speeding toward the edge of a cliff and not warning him. That's like seeing someone in a burning house and not going in to rescue him.
Hell is real. It is an unimaginably horrible place. It's blacker than the darkest black you can imagine...lonelier than the deepest loneliness you've ever felt...more painful than the worst pain you've ever experienced. Because God is not there. It is a place of total separation from God, a place where God is completely absent.
It's not a popular thing to say. It's not a warm, fuzzy, make-you-feel-good message. But it's true. And I'm telling you this because I don't want you to go there. And you don't have to. God in His just holiness must punish sin, but He in his just love sent His Son to die on the cross, in our place. "For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life." (John 3:16, NIV) Jesus conquered sin and death through His death and resurrection. Through Him we can be set free from sin and be restored to a right relationship with God - not because of anybody you are or anything you've done, but because of Who He is and what He has done.
This gift is yours for the taking. It's free - you can't earn it. "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord." (Romans 6:23, NIV) Another speaker I once heard, Bob Lenz, put it this way: "Grace is a gift, not a paycheck." Louie Giglio said, "Grace is God at work doing what I can't do." Ephesians 2:8-9 sums it up quite nicely: "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast." (NIV)
So how do you get this gift - this grace? Just reach out and take it. Tell God that you believe that He sent His Son to die for you - tell Him that you know that you're a sinner and need Jesus. He won't turn you away. "Yet to all who received Him, to those who believed in His Name, He gave the right to become children of God." (John 1:12, NIV)
Sin is real. Hell is real. But God is real. His justice and love are real. His gift of salvation through His Son Jesus is real.
God will never, ever leave you - never, ever forsake you. He always keeps His promises. Nothing can separate you from His love, and His faithfulness reaches to the skies. The Christian life isn't all "sunshine and daisies," but it's good. God gives you strength for every difficulty, hope in the midst of deepest despair, and comfort during grief.
1 Corinthians 2:9 - "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him." (NIV)
Ephesians 3:20-21 - "Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." (NIV)
Jeremiah 29:11- "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." (NIV)

Saturday, December 5, 2009

girl language

it occurs to me that guys think girls are complicated. usually, we're telling you exactly what we want, you just don't always understand it. so here's a little guide to what we say or do, and what that means.

when i walk away, i want you to follow me.
when i shut you out, i want you to fight for me.
when you know something's wrong, but i say it's "fine", i want you to ask me again.
when i'm upset and i cross my arms, i want you to hug me.
when i'm angry and i cross my arms, fix whatever you did wrong real quick.
when i cry, i want you to hug me. you don't have to say anything, just hug me.
when i say my neck hurts, i want you to rub it.
when i say i'm cold, i want you to give me your jacket or put your arm around me.
when i say i don't want to talk about it, i don't want to talk about it (but ask me again anyway, just to be sure).
when i make an effort (and ESPECIALLY if i ask you about it), i want you to say something, and be enthusiastic about it.
when you think something good about me, say it.
when i hang out with you and your friends and they start razzing on me, i want you to stand up for me.
when i swoon over that celebrity, don't take it personally, he'll never be as handsome as you, i promise.
when i go on about how beautiful that actress is, it's not always because i'm after a compliment (but it's still nice to hear).
when i self-depricate, the best thing to do is make a joke about it.
when i say i need chocolate, it's as real a need as water. give me chocolate.
when i say something's gross (like your farts), it's gross. and no, i'm not going to learn to love it.
when i cry at a sad/happy/romantic/completelyrandom movie, it's because i need to cry. no, i'm not weird.
when i obsess over things, it'll pass eventually. please be patient, and DON'T tell me to calm down or get over it. (you will be slapped.)
when i explain the drama i'm going through with my friends, i want you to be on my side. period.
and when i tell you i love you, i mean it.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

question and answer asked me:
"If you knew today was your last day on Earth, how would you spend it and why?"
I answered:
"i'd do all the things i'm scared to do now. i'd take pictures of myself. i'd go to the beach in a bikini. i'd stand up in the traditional service of my church and sing what i want. i'd go sky diving. i'd swim in a lake. i'd kiss the guy i like. i'd make up with some old friends and tell some old enemies exactly when i forgave them. i'd tell the truth. i'd stand up and say, 'this is what i believe, and i don't care if that offends you'. i'd go up to that random girl i see in the mall and tell her i think she's gorgeous. i'd eat what i want. i'd talk to the people i never thought i was good enough to talk to. i'd tell the people i miss that i miss them. i'd call my family down the street and in Estonia and everywhere in between. i'd wear high heels with short shorts. i'd dance to whatever music i want. i'd wear red lipstick and too much eye liner. i'd repay all my debts. i'd tell some of my secrets. and mostly, i would proclaim the name of Jesus every chance i got."

Monday, October 5, 2009

Make Some Noise by Hannah Montana

It's easy to feel like you're all alone
To feel like nobody knows
The great that you are
The good that's inside you
Is trying so hard to break through

Maybe it's your time to lift off and fly
You won't know if you never try
I will be there with you all of the way
You'll be fine

Don't let anyone tell you
That you're not strong enough
Don't give up
There's nothing wrong with just being yourself
That's more than enough
So come on and raise your voice
Speak your mind and make some noise
And sing hey, hey
Make some noise hey, hey yeah

You want to be known
You want to be heard
And know you are beautiful
You have so much to give
Some change you wanna live
So shout it out and let it show

You have a diamond inside of your heart
A light that shines bright as the stars
Don't be afraid to be all that you are
You'll be fine

Don't let anyone tell you
That you're not strong enough
Don't give up
There's nothing wrong with just being yourself
That's more than enough
So come on and raise your voice
Speak your mind and make some noise
And sing hey, hey
Make some noise hey, hey yeah

You can't just sit back and watch the world change
It matters what you've got to say
There's no one else who can stand in your place
So come on, it's never too late

Maybe it's your time to lift off and fly
You won't know if you never try

Don't let anyone tell you
That you're not strong enough
Don't give up
There's nothing wrong with just being yourself
That's more than enough
So come on and raise your voice
Speak your mind and make some noise
And sing hey, hey
Make some noise hey, hey yeah

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Wait and See by Brandon Heath

the theme song of my life:

I was born in Tennessee
Late July humidity
Doctor said I was lucky to be alive
I’ve been trouble since the day that I got here
Trouble till the day that I disappear
That’ll be the day that I finally get it right

There is hope for me yet
Because God won’t forget
All the plans he’s made for me
I have to wait and see
He’s not finished with me yet

I never really was that good in school
I talked too much, broke the rules
Teacher thought I was hopeless fool alright
I don’t know how but I made it through
It’s one of those things that you’ve gotta do
But I always had a knack for telling the truth

There is hope for me yet
Because God won’t forget
All the plans he’s made for me
I have to wait and see
He’s not finished with me yet

Still wondering why I’m here
Still wrestling with my fear
But oh, He’s up to something
And the farther on I go
I’ve seen enough to know
That I’m, not here for nothing
He’s up to something
So now’s my time to be a man
Follow my heart as far as I can
No telling where I’m ending up tonight
I never slow down or so it seems
But singing my heart it’s one of my dreams
All I gotta do is hold on tight

There is hope for me yet
Because God won’t forget
All the plans he’s made for me
I have to wait and see
He’s not finished with me yet

Thursday, September 24, 2009


i'm just a different kind of person. i'm not made like every one else.
i'll tell you i'm a city chick, but there's nothing i love more than sitting in a forest, listening to a waterfall.
i'd rather lay around my house in my best dress and go out in public in my most comfortable sweat pants.
i love shoes, but i hate wearing them.
i love the night because of its darkness, but i never sleep well at night.
i'll take candles and sunlight over electric lights any day, and a candle's not a candle without fire.
i'm all for eating healthfully and organically, as long as i can still have french fries & ketchup now and then.
i have a thing for coffee drinks, but i hate coffee, and i always prefer green tea.
i always feel fat while i'm working out, and skinny after i take a shower after working out.
home cooking is the best... except when it's not.
i enjoy music of ALL kinds... except for the music i don't enjoy.
i identify with modern, but love the classics too (in regards to everything).
i don't want a husband and i don't want kids, but i want to be married and have a family.
i hate being single, but i also hate commitment.
i want to get as far away as fast as possible, but i never, ever want to leave my family.
i hate it where i live, but i really can't imagine calling any other place home.
i sleep best during the day and do my deepest thinking when i'm tired.
i write songs, poems, and stories, and while i want to share them all with every one, i also know that by literary standards, they all suck.
i call myself an artist, but there's a lot of art that i either don't get, or just don't like or care about.
i have discovered that every place has good and bad things about it, now i'm just looking for the place whose good draws me in and whose bad i can ignore.
i don't want to go to college, but i refuse to let myself be uneducated.
there's nothing better than milk chocolate... unless you add caramel.
i am a true southern girl... who was made to live in the north.
i love exercising, but i hate working out.
i want to love and be loved, but i don't want to hurt or be hurt.
i'd rather stay up all night by myself than stay up all day with other people, but i miss my family when i do.

i'm just different from the world around me and the people i know. i'm not a conformist. some people say that's bad. i say that's just the way i was made, and i have no desire to change that.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009


i lay here with my window open, listening to the sounds of the rain.
i stare out the windows and see the trees standing in their shower, being washed clean for a new day.
i feel the breeze as it flows through my room.
the car noises pass and fade, eventually leaving altogether.
but the rain stays.

the beautiful rain whose sounds lull me,
whose feel excites me,
whose smell fills me with hope,
whose sight sooths my soul.

the rain washes my spirit, preparing me for a new day.
it cools the air and brings with it excitement for the seasons to come.
the rain envelops everything it touches.

i only wish i could stand in the rain every day, letting it drench me until i am clean once more.

Monday, August 31, 2009

i'm a great casting director!

In the movie of your life, who would play...

Sara Rue
...a curvy redhead with a head for comedy and a heart for love.

...Your love interest?
Brad Pitt
...just the type of guy i go for: too perfect to be obtainable. with, of course, the Abercrombie-model good looks.

...Your best friend?
Jennifer Garner loving and smart, she knows what to say and how to cheer me up when Bradley there ends up falling for my sister (played brilliantly by Brigid Brannaugh) instead of me.

...Your mother?
Allison Janney
...GORGEOUS, talented, funny, uber smart... just like my real mother!

...Your worst enemy?
Reese Witherspoon, supportive, the perfect friend... until she stabs you in the back. Reese would be perfect for this role. sweet to your face and venomous behind your back.


i picked these actors for these roles based on the people in my life and the roles in which i have seen these actors. i think they're all great actors and, from what little of them i know, good people.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

watch it, mister.

being a woman is NOT a weakness. and using phrases like "man up" or "grow a pair" just propagates that myth. i'm not a feminist, but i still take pride in being a STRONG woman. DON'T underestimate me - i fight like a GIRL.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

DVR Psalms

TV. the dirtiest of addictive drugs.
In Plain Sight
House, M.D.
The West Wing
and now...
Lie to Me
my shows. my drug. my addiction.
the drama! the action!
the unimaginably gorgeous actors, and the characters that make them attractive!
AH! i love it.

it is now 5:34 in the morning, and i have been trying to clear out my DVR since 9. the only problem is, i haven't been able to delete like anything i've watched! it's all been too good!! just when you think the two characters (who clearly should have been attached at the hip from the moment they met) are going to be together... one of them gets kidnapped, or remembers that they serve in the same chain of command, or that one of them calls the other "boss". UGH!! it's so indescribably frusterating yet somehow exhilerating!! i can't put into words what it's like as your whole body tenses, breath held, waiting for their lips to meet... and then *GASP* some one pulls away or screams in terror or... whatever! your body and mind release, yet you grasp for an explanation. your eyes, ears, and heart all search frantically for answers... what's wrong? how can it be fixed?? it... AHH!!! i can't... even... form sentences!!


i don't know. i think i need an intervention. but i'm not ready to change yet so it wouldn't work anyway (thank you, A&E). i just... GAH! i need another high! but i'm all out!! i've seen everything dramatic in my DVR at least once. ahh! i'm like freakin out, here!!

whooooo. ok, breathe..... i am OKAY. at least i will be.

blahhhhh i have this meeting in the morning. and i can't just not go, cause i'm representing some one else. blahhhh. whatev. OK so i'm going to go take a shower (now that it's 5:45) and think about the mind-blowing awesomeness that makes up my DVR list.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

we'll call this a "blogette".

currently listening to: "Finally" by Fergie
current mood: asleep

i'll make this short 'cause i'm falling asleep on my keyboard and i gotta get to napping if i'm gonna do it. i just wanted to jot down a couple things to blog about later.

1. the west wing - my new favorite obsession. holyfreakingcow it's amazing.
2. puppies - i had a dream last night that i got a dalmation puppy and now i have this insatiable urge to cuddle with something small and furry.
3. 17 again - holyfriggenSQUEE. more on that later.
4. niece and nephew's bd party - i.e., the reason i'm not fully blogging right now.
5. house - need i say more?
6. JAG - "white uniform and gold wings" HECK. YES.
7. "doubt" - oooooh, good movie...
8. the impact House, JAG, and The West Wing have had on my iTunes account - yay youtube & fanfiction.
9. twitter - yay
10. facebook - boo.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

"By Your Side" Tenth Avenue North

Why are you striving these days
Why are you trying to earn grace
Why are you crying
Let me lift up your face
Just don't turn away

Why are you looking for love
Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough
To where will you go child
Tell me where will you run
To where will you run

And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Look at these hands and my side
They swallowed the grave on that night
When I drank the world's sin
So I could carry you in
And give you life
I want to give you life

And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Cause I, I love you
I want you to know
That I, I love you

And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you
I'll never let you go

Monday, April 13, 2009

random rant

current mood: insomniac-ish
currently watching: SouthLAnd

ok. WHY are all the cute actors like way older than me?? i looked up this guy, Benjamin McKenzie, expecting for him to be like 25 or something. he's THIRTY-ONE!! SO not fair!! ok, so me being 19, even if he was like 25 that'd still be a stretch [oh yeah, not to mention he's an actor], but 31?!? once again, SO. NOT. FAIR. geez. my sister talks about how much it sucks to get old [at all of 26 years of age, might i add], but if there's any upside to getting "older", it's that the guys get cuter. i'm sorry, but most teenage guys just aren't that cute. and the ones who are are either stupid/immature, into drugs, or gay. SO not joking. ugh. do they get cuter as they get older or did cuteness just skip my generation???

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

hardcore House fans STAY AWAY!! spoilers (for Simple Explanation) that will ruin your LIFE.

warning: if you are a fan of House, DO NOT read this!!!

i'm serious.

the whole thing is one big spoiler.

and i mean big.

like knowing the end of season 4 times like 20.

if you don't know the end of season 4, then you're not a hardcore fan, so you can read this.

if you're a grief counselor, i'm probably gonna need you about this time next week.

I DON'T WANT CAMERON TO DIE!!!!!!! and i can list about a dozen reasons why i'm sure it's going to be her. and the episode where "some one" is going to die is next week. NEXT WEEK! only about 160 hours from now! (and, no joke, if that episode for some reason doesn't record, i'm seriously going to go postal on direcTV's collective ass!!) i'm so... i'm not ready to handle this. i seriously feel like i'm losing a personal friend. i may have to go back to my therapist in order to get over this. only i'm not joking or being over-dramatic. i've literally been through 4 of the 5 stages of grief. the only one i haven't gotten to yet is acceptance. i'm currently wobbling between denial: "no. it was leaked incorrectly and it's not really gonna happen. none of the main characters are going to die!!!", and bargaining: "please, PLEASE, let it be ANY ONE besides Cameron!! i could almost take even Cuddy or 13, almost. just please, NOT CAMERON!!"
i had almost gotten over it and was simply excited about having a new episode for the first time in 2 weeks, but then the preview came on for next week's episode. i started sobbing. "no. no! please, NO!!" my chest was heaving and tears stung my eyes. i think i'm still in denial enough that i didn't completely fall apart, but i feel absolutely sick to my stomach. and that happens every time i think about Cameron dieing.

ok. reasons i think it's Cameron:
1. she's like never on the show anyway, so it would make sense, out of all the actors, that Jennifer would be the one to leave
2. katie jacobson [writer/creator] said the cast would look "pretty much the same next season" and, as i said before, Cameron is never there.
3. they've already said that chase [jesse spencer] would be on practically every episode next season. dealing with losing his girlfriend by hanging around House & his team too much, maybe?
4. Jennifer and Jesse were engaged, but called off the wedding a couple years ago. they constantly told the press they were fine with still working with each other, but maybe that was just a cover up...?
5. Cameron has basically run her course in terms of the show. she's not progressing anything any more. from a writing standpoint, it's basically time for her to leave. (why couldn't she just frikken CHANGE HOSPITALS?!?)
6. it doesn't make sense that any of the other characters leave - they're all still buried in plot lines (except for Chase, which, if his girlfriend dies - dut duh duh DAH - new storyline).
7. it doesn't make sense that any of the other actors leave. [see 1, 5, & 6]
8. on the teaser for next week, they showed foreman and 13 holding hands (standing up) so it's not either of them.
9. they showed house, wilson, cuddy, and Cameron individually gasping in surprise. it's a definite probability that they would show whoever dies alive in order to throw off the audience. and considering that none of the other three could POSSIBLY leave without the show basically ending... well... you get the picture.
10. they DIDN'T show chase. possibly because he'll spend next episode crying the whole time? that would give it away.
11. they also didn't show kutner or taub. those are the two people who have the least connection with Cameron, and would therefore have the mildest reactions.

reasons it's no one else:
1. it can't be taub - the writers have worked too hard backing him into corners that would force him off the show to actually kick him off. (or at least to kill him off. that would be too easy.)
2. katy jacobs said it wasn't any one obvious, so it can't be House or 13, the two characters who have the most to die for.
3. it can't be cuddy - they've built up this relationship between her and house for about 2 years now. besides, she's too integral to the show. i mean if there's a new dean of medicine, House is gone.
4. it can't be wilson - Hugh once said that the story is basically able to be told because of Wilson. and he's right. but that's another unimaginably long post.
5. it can't be kutner - he always comes up with the things House doesn't.
6. it can't be foreman - a) the writers worked too hard to keep him in the fellowship to kick him off the show. b) 13's story is tragic enough, there's no way she would also lose the man who's in love with her.
7. it can't be chase - they already said Jesse would be back every episode next season.
8. it can't be house - well DUH.

so yeah. if not Cameron, then who?
holy crap i'm depressed now.
oh, and please don't tell me to "relax, it's only a TV show". i know that. and i don't care.

thank you and sleep well. God knows i won't.

Friday, March 20, 2009


currently [not] reading:

OH MY FREAKING GOSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm like so freaking out right now!!!



so i have the RSS feed on my homepage, and today i saw something on there that i wish i hadn't seen. and now i'm absolutely gonna CRY!! only i'm not joking. i'm like seriously tearing up. go read if you want, but be warned, it's a serious spoiler. i don't read spoilers, but the title was a spoiler. and i didn't want to read it if it was a spoiler, so i made my sister go read it for me. she said it was a huge spoiler, so i didn't read it. but she did read me some parts of it.

anyway, if you do go read it, i'm like 95% sure i know who it is.

^that was me crying.

Saturday, February 14, 2009


currently reading: confessions of a shopaholic
current mood: astonished, and a little freaked out.

ok. go here and just look around for a minute.

are you freaking out? that totally freaked me out.

first off the prices. HOLY COW. of course, the thing i liked most was the black eyelet gown. seven THOUSAND, three hundred ninety five dollars. what the heck am i messing around with music for? i should be a designer!!

secondly, the models! they all look exactly the same! but look closely - they're not all one person!! there one brunette, and two or three different blondes. i honestly can't tell. they all look like wax, and they all look like corpses! i mean look at them: no emotion in the eye, no color in the cheek. it's freaky!!!

ok, sorry. end rant.

anyway, i've been meaning to update and several things have been floating around in my head today, but this was the first one that really seemed postworthy. or, rather, really seemed postworthy and i was around my computer while i remembered it. i've forgotten all my other topics. oh well. either they weren't that important in the first place or you'll hear about them later. either way, ttfn.

love and hugs,

Tuesday, January 27, 2009


current mood: uber chill.
currently listening to: "teardrop" by massive attack. aka the House, M.D. theme.

soooooo... i really have nothing to post about, but it's 5:40, i can't sleep, and i haven't posted in... some time (idk how long).

my computer's doing this weird thing where it randomly picks letters to not interpret. like i know i'm hitting the keys, but the letters aren't showing up. whatever.

oh so Hugh Laurie won a SAG award last night. his second, i believe, but don't quote me on that. congrats, Mr. Laurie! the cast of House was nominated, but lost to some other cast which, i'm sure, could never compete. [my tv obsession's cast can beat up your tv obsession's cast! and out-look 'em to boot. i'm sure there has never been a tv cast so full of such stunningly beautiful people, and there probably won't ever be again.]

i have to pee.

OOH, that reminds me, last night's episode of House was really good. it was so involved, it definitely could have been two hours, if the writers had expanded on any of the story lines. i was very sad, though, that all the romantic spark between house and cuddy and house and cameron seemed to be missing. i mean, i know none of them have ever been a "thing", but there's always been something between those two pairs. there was sexual banter between house and cameron, and in the last scene, cameron all but confessed that she was still in love with house [come on, you know it's true], but when hugh and jen were on screen... something that used to be there wasn't. idk, maybe i'm imagining it. maybe i'm reading too much into it. maybe i'm not reading enough. idk. there were some sweet scenes between house and cuddy, though. if those two are gonna get together, i hope they do it already. there's gonna be a lot of seriously pissed off people [including me] if the writers pull a JAG and wait until the SERIES finale to get them together when they've so clearly felt something for each other and even talked about it. [i still don't buy that Mac admitted that she was in love with Harm in season six, and they didn't get together for another 4 years. i mean, come on.]

i'm hot. like temperature-wise. idk, though, i straightened my hair yesterday, and it's pretty darn cute. i even went out into public with no make-up on! that's like huge for me. but yeah, it's really that hot.

speaking of hot, it was hot out today!! i walked outstide to get something, expecting it to be cold like it has been for the past month, and i was like "guh-ross!!" it was like 80 degrees and muggy as all get out. then, of course, the low for this thursday is 29. yay, Texas.

sooooo... i think that's about all i have for now.

love & hugs,

Thursday, January 15, 2009

something deeper.

Audience of One by Big Daddy Weave

I come on my knees
To lay down before you
Bringing all that I am
Longing only to know you
Seeking your face
And not only your hand
I find you embracing me
Just as I am

And I lift these songs
To you and you alone
As I sing to you
In my praises make your home

To my audience of one
You are Father, and you are Son
As your spirit flows free,
Let it find within me
A heart that beats to praise you.
And now just to know you more
Has become my great reward
To see your kingdom come
And your will be done
I only desire to be yours,

So what could I bring
To honor your majesty
What song could I sing
That would move the heart of royalty
When all that I have
Is this life that you’ve given me
So Lord let me live for you
My song with humility

And Lord as the love song
Of my life is played
I have one desire
To bring glory to your name

To my audience of one
You are Father, and you are Son
As your spirit flows free,
Let it find within me
A heart that beats to praise you.
And now just to know you more
Has become my great reward
To see your kingdom come
And your will be done
I only desire to be yours,

And we lift these songs
To you and you alone
As we sing to you
In our praises make your home

To my audience of one
You are Father, and you are Son
As your spirit flows free,
Let it find within me
A heart that beats to praise you.
And now just to know you more
Has become my great reward
To see your kingdom come
And your will be done
I only desire to be yours,

as a Christian, this song is so easy to hear and identify with. you hear it and go, "yeah, what a great message - performing for God alone, not caring what others think". as an artist, musician, and performer, this song is kind of really hard to think about. like the ideal of living only for God and caring only what He thinks is kool and all, but performing an audience of ONE? that's like... scary. think "career suicide". but i have to force myself to realize that He really is all that matters. that He is the only thing that will last. that worldly fame will fade and die, but His knowledge of me will last an ETERNITY. (also a scary topic, but one for another day.)

on another note: what powerful lyrics!

"seeking your face/and not only your hand" is holding my attention for some reason, though i don't fully understand it.

"i find You embracing me/just as i am". it constantly amazes me that God knows absolutely EVERYTHING about us, but loves us any way. and what's more, loves us more than we could ever imagine. He takes us just as we are. rather, he constantly takes us back just as we are.

"in my praises make your home". a house is temporary. a home is forever. our praises to Him should be constant and forever.

"what song could i sing/that would move the heart of Royalty". as a singer i'm constantly thinking about how well songs fit my voice or what song i would perform if i were performing at this or that venue. i never stop to think, though, that God created music. He knows all the chords, He's heard all my bad notes. i could sing better that i've ever sung, i could even be regaled as the best singer of all time. but if it's not in His name, it is worth nothing.

"all that i have/is the life that You’ve given me/so Lord let me live for You/my song with humility". it's so weird to think that the most precious thing i have - my very life - was never mine to begin with. i don't own myself, and to be honest, it's probably a good thing. one, i could never pay the price to get into Heaven. two, it forces me to be accountable. to realize that, though, i have to be humble. i have to live with humility. everything i do should be overshadowed by the glory of God.

"and Lord as the love song/of my life is played". to think the Creator of the universe wrote my life story to be a love song... it brings tears to my eyes.

i hope this song speaks to you. if it doesn't, go find one that does. write about it. and let me know so i can peek into your brain.

Monday, January 12, 2009

for real this time.

current mood: practically asleep
currently watching: E!'s fashion police

the golden globes were AMAZING. they're always my favorite awards show. every one's so relaxed and chill. my current obsession, Olivia Wilde, was nominated by the fashion police for best dressed of the night [idk who won, i watched the first 20 minutes then came to bed b/c i was falling asleep], and she so totally deserved it. she looked beautiful. she absolutely took my breath away. see photos here and read my comment down below.

any way, more to come about the golden globes and fashion hits and misses tomorrow. like i said, i'm basically asleep right now.

oh, side note, i am now officially in love with Kate Winslet. again, more to come on that tomorrow.

love and hugs,

Sunday, January 11, 2009

weird day.

current mood: fragile.
currently listening to: "you raise me up" by selah

i need a hug.

topics to be discussed tomorrow: the west wing and the golden globes.

Friday, January 9, 2009

oh, really? it's friday already? ok kool.

current mood: chilled to the point of boredom
currently listening to: "crazy" by britney spears. love that chick.

so i got a spur-of-the-moment haircut yesterday. my tanning place is really near my hair place, and i was over there, so i went in to see my person and hopefully make an appointment. amazingly she had one open that afternoon. i was originally a little trepidatious about it, i was just gonna get my bangs trimmed. i've been so ready to have long hair again since about 4 months after i whacked it all off in march. she was able to keep all the length, though, and just gave me some amazing layers. i LOVE it. like it just frames my face and falls perfectly. SO if you know me, ask me on myspace or facebook and i'll tell you where i got it done. my person's absolutely amazing.

i think i'm gonna go design this clothes line that's been stuck in my head for a few days now.

love and hugs,

Thursday, January 8, 2009

follow up to "blah"

mood: much much better.
currently listening to: "Tripping Billies" by DMB's amazing what a meal, a couple ibuprofen, and a really good piece of chocolate can do.

i'm off to get a pedicure.


mood: insanely annoyed.
currently reading:

so, every thing's bugging me right now. which is weird cause i'm not tired or, well, i guess i am a little hungry seeing as i haven't eaten in 14 hours. but i don't have any appetite. but that's beside the point. i'm like on this rampage to like fix everything that's wrong in the world. i was reading this blog i subscribe to and there were pictures of the cast of House at the people's choice awards and i totally just ripped into the girls of the show for letting themselves get to skinny and how they represent all the problems of Hollywood and all this terrible stuff. and that's so weird because i love the show and i absolutely adore those women! like practically to the point of idolization. [not really, but you get my point.] and then i was on facebook, and i was seeing some of the stupid things my friends were saying and seeing pictures of under age people drinking and i just had to get away from the site. i would have woken up tomorrow having no friends if i hadn't been able to hold my "tongue".

idk. it just... bah. i'm gonna go watch... something and hope i can get my mind to settle down.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

hormones or something like it

mood: depressed, but really glad i can get this out.
currently listening to: "some devil" by Dave Matthews
warning: this entry is completely depressing, read AYOR.

357 days of the year, i love being single. i revere it. i plan to stay that way forever and never never EVER have kids. [don't get me wrong, i love the crap out of kids. i'm simply NOT cut out to be a mother.]

those other 8 days, though...

anyway, today was one of those 8 days. it started out normally. nothing unusual. then i watched the most recent episode of "superstars of dance". it was so kool! the Americans totally kicked butt and the russian ballerina was amazing!! [of course, she studied at the bolshoi academy. duh.] and i just really wanted some one i could talk to about that. i didn't care if they really cared what i had to say or even about dance at all. i just wanted some one to tell my thoughts to. i got to talk to my mom for a couple minutes [like literally 2] when she came home for her lunch break, but then she had to go back to work. so that was that...

then, i watched last night's episode of "the secret life of the American teenager". (i know, i know. the writing's bad, the acting's worse, and the plot practically spells "contrived", but you care so much about the fates of these characters, you can't not watch. it's definitely a guilty pleasure.) *SPOILER ALERT* the main character and her boyfriend get married. yeah, they're FIFTEEN!!! now, obviously this isn't the fairy tale relationship every girl dreams about. the girl's 15, pregnant, and has now eloped with the guy she's in love with who, btw, is not the father of her child. even still. they got married and had a wedding ceremony at a little chapel and she wore a cream-colored dress and had purple flowers and it was just too cute and sad. i wanted to cry. and not because i'm a wedding-cryer, i'm not. it was just so sad. she'd been through so much and now her parents were getting a divorce and she was having a secret, illegal marriage [oh yeah, they got fake IDs] and nothing was going as planned. and what was even more sad was that i in some ways envied her. i mean, she had a guy who was totally willing to basically risk his future for her, a sister who would stand by her side through ANY thing, two friends who showed up uninvited to be her bridesmaids, and a baby on the way. told you it was sad.

the icing on the cake, ironically, was the funniest show i watched all day. i tivo the late late show, and the host, Craig Ferguson, got married over his Christmas break! like the first shot of the show was just of his left hand. i didn't get it at first. i was like, "something looks off here. OHMYGOSH HE GOT MARRIED!!!" he hadn't said anything at all about it in the weeks leading up to it. he finally showed a picture of the wedding. he was so handsome in his tux, and his bride was BEAUTIFUL. they were married on a farm in vermont in the middle of a snowstorm. everything was covered in snow and beautiful and the two could not have looked happier. and the whole show, Craig could not stop smiling. i mean he was seriously glowing. every single thing he said was "my wife this" and "my wife that". i mean seriously, it was so sweet i think it gave me a cavity. and i only say it was funny because, well, he's a comedian and a talk show host and his show's always funny and so yeah. so i couldn't be sad at this, but still, in the back of my head i was going, "WHAT THE HECK?!? is EVERY ONE getting married except ME?!?!? what is going on here?!?!?!?" [just like that too.]

so yeah. i guess that's that. i had more but i'll have to post it tomorrow. i've now been awake for 20 hours straight for the second day in a row, so i'm pretty tired.

topics to be covered tomorrow: children, specifically sleeping babies, and the biggest loser.


Sunday, January 4, 2009

number one. love.

current mood: insomnia-ic/writer'sblock-ish
currently listening to: rockferry, by duffy


sooooo, yay, blog one!

i've been meaning to create a blog since april. why i haven't done it until now, idk. why i am now, that i do know. but it's not really all that important to you.

i thought and thought and thought about creating my own blog. i considered making it topical, but 1) i'm not obsessed enough with any one thing to maintain a blog on it, and 2) i want a place where i can write freely. i'm probably the most random person you'll ever meet. i know every one says that, but for me it's true. i watched an episode of malcom in the middle a few years ago and malcom tried to describe what it was like in his head. he said something to the extent of, "do you ever feel like your brain is a bee hive, and all the bees buzzing around are your thoughts? well my brain is like a hundred of those, every moment of every day"*. well, malcom, i know the feeling.

so yes. this is why i have named my blog "right randomosity". it will always be random, but hopefully it will be right as well. take that to mean what you will.

as to the actual writing part: in personal writing, grammar is flexible. i still try to follow the rules, but i won't agonize over it. sorry. spelling: i'm not so goodly. yes, there is a spell-check button, but i'm so used to working without one that i will probably forget about it from time to time. once again, sorry. finally, as you've probably noticed, i don't use capitalization. well, that's a generalization. what i should say is i reserve the right to capitalize. haha. i use it mostly to emphasize things (e.g. my nieces and nephews are SO CUTE!!), and for important things like God and country. if any of these things bug you to distraction, sorry. i would suggest you not follow this blog for the sake of your sanity. (that's my nice way of saying, "it's not gonna change any time soon".)

so that's it for now. i will post again soon. probably later tonight if this writer's block doesn't subside.

love and hugs,

*please don't quote me on this, i'm working from a several-year-old memory.